On Being a Single Mom

Being a single mom is hard. Everyone knows this in theory, but it’s difficult to grasp just how hard it is in reality. There are challenges that you can’t imagine: exhaustion, frustration and feelings of being overwhelmed and inadequate. You want to make up for what is missing, knowing you can never be both mom and dad. You want to shield them from the difficulties and hardships. You wish you could afford to buy them everything they want and need. Sometimes, a lot of times, you have to bite your tongue.

People tell you, “They will figure it out.” You bite your tongue some more, hoping they are right. One day, you wake up and realize it’s not a battle. It’s not a competition. It’s about the kids and doing what’s best for them and creating the best environment possible, even at your expense. Most of us know this and many try hard to do that very thing. Some don’t. When you are faced with a challenging ex who says horrible things about you and treats your children in a manner that breaks your heart, causing you to cry yourself to sleep. You take the high road and pray that your love, support and comfort is enough.

On Mother’s Day, my 15-year-old son wrote me a letter that confirmed all of it. His maturity and insight was breathtaking. His love pure. His gratitude and understanding heartwarming.

Reading and rereading that page and half, typed letter, confirmed all that I had prayed and hoped for. The hard work is worth it. My children know I love them with all of my heart and I will always support, listen to and love them.

My son concluded his letter with these words, which will always make me cry tears of joy.

You are truly my guiding star, my greatest role model, and I love you. Thank you for all of the sacrifices that you made and continue to make for [us]. You are the most important figure in my life and I don’t know who I would be without you. That’s what I mean when I say, ‘Happy Mother’s Day.’”

 

One thought on “On Being a Single Mom

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