At Thanksgiving, my mother made the comment that we (my family members) are all “butterballs.”
I said, “Hey!”
She looked me in the eye and said, “Mary Kay, we are ALL butterballs.”
I wasn’t sure what to do with that. I don’t think you should say that to anyone, at any time. But, I swallowed my reaction and got up to put away the mountains of leftovers.
I’ve stewed over it for nearly a month. What mom says that to her daughters and son? Why does she think that is acceptable? I know that I am nowhere near my younger days. I see every roll, dimple and jiggle of my mid-life body. I also have a healthy blood pressure, healthy cholesterol and can do 95 pushups in three minutes, 27 on my knees. I’m not the muscular, skinny girl of my youth, and I’m OK with that.
I have two remarkable children. I don’t spend 40 hours a week exercising, like I did when I was so fit. I’m happy to get in two! I sit most of the day. I use my brain all day. I plan. I run errands and shuttle kids. I cook. I keep up with all of the little and big details of life. I take all of my roles very seriously, especially being a mom.
And that’s the beauty of it. Being a mom is why I have this body. Being a mom is why I have a C-section scar and a roll of fat that will never go away. Being a mom is why I have a layer of fat covering my body from mid-thigh to chest. I’m not huge. My jeans range from 6-10, but I am soft and round in the middle. My bum is big and curvy best describes me.
But last night, as I lay snuggling my girl, she pulled up my shirt and played with my jiggles.
She exclaimed, “You’re soft and cuddly. I like cuddling with you.”
She regularly tells me not to lose my “squishiness.” And why should I? I’m healthy. I look OK. I enjoy life. I exercise. I eat right. I enjoy food and wine, but not in excess. Would I like to lose the 25 pounds I put on five years ago? YES. Am I going to kill myself to do it and sacrifice quality time with my kids, starving myself and feeling stressed out? NO. I’m going to focus on being fully present with my children, exercising for fun and fitness and enjoying life in a healthy way. Am I a butterball? No, but I’m not thin and I’m OK with that.